Be honest with others

“How would your relationships change if you resolved never to lie again? What truths might suddenly come into view in your life? What kind of person would you become? And how might you change the people around you? It is worth finding out.”  Sam Harris

Unfortunately, it is human to err, and I think, it is human to lie. If we can lie and get through something a bit easier, we are going to lie. We will do anything to make things easier for ourselves. I wanted to make a resolution not to lie to my parents anymore. I do not really lie that often, but I do lie occasionally to my parents, and that is only wrt the guys I am dating. They do not like to hear of it, and I do not like to speak of it to them.

So we kind of have an agreement, where they pretend I am still a virgin and single, and I pretend the same. Of course, when I actually do like a guy a lot, and want them to meet him, that will be a problem, I guess, we shall think about that issue when it comes up. It hasn’t yet. So no worries on that.

But can you imagine if I told them every time I was going to go on a date, or sleep with someone. Yikes! I am getting heart palpitations just thinking of it. I cannot imagine. And I hope it never comes to complete honesty on that aspect. It would result in my already tainted reputation being tainted even further.

Be honest with yourself

Nowadays, a big thing for me is to be honest with myself. Not bullshit myself. I am very good at hiding my opinions and thoughts. I am good at hiding stress, by doing copious amounts of yoga. But then, I am not being honest with anyone, especially not myself, which is unhealthy.

I GOT A NEW JOB! I know after applying for almost a year and a half, since April 2010, I finally got a job on Sep 23rd, 2011. I mean, I was working intermittently but admittedly, not really full time and not to my full potential. Which is of course the most important question. Are you living to your full potential? Are you living a happy life? Are you happy? Are you compromising?

I was reading this book by Anita Shreve, Where or When, and in that book, there were some very unhappy people, who had been compromising for 31 years. When they finally stopped, they hurt a lot of people and it was hard, but there was this desperation about them, because they realized they had wasted so much time being who they really weren’t. 31 years is a long time to be someone you really are not. It made me feel so sad, for so many people out there, who really are living lives of lost meaning, lives of quiet desperation.

The most important thing you can do is not live a life like that. Be true to your roots, make yourself uncomfortable, be honest.